Just Say Goo

Cellphones have become a menace to society, a necessary evil making it easy to communicate while we area away from home, but in terms of creating stupid behavoir, they are the devil. Talking while driving is bad enough, but texting while driving, on a highway, traveling 60 mph in heavy traffic.... WHY? do you want to die?

Hindu God's have 6 arms. They can talk on the phone, put on makeup and eat all at the same time. You do not, you have two. It takes two hands to drive safely so why does anyone want to take this risk? You might think you are important, which is why you are answering the flurry of texts coming your way. But really stop and think about this...is your life so trivial and insignificant that you are willing to risk dying just to answer a text message?

We don't even know where to begin to address this, so lets start with some statistics.84 percent of cell phone users stated that they believe using a cell phone while driving increases the risk of being in an accident. Teenagers seem to be the worst offenders. Gee, what a surprise and they have not been driving very long so don't have much behind the wheel experience. Why are they doing something that further distracts them from driving?

• Each year, 21% of fatal car crashes involving teenagers between the ages of 16 and 19 were the result of cell phone usage. This result has been expected to grow as much as 4% every year.
• Almost 50% of all drivers between the ages of 18 and 24 are texting while driving.

WTF? do you want to live to see your next birthday? do you want to graduate from high school? Do you think your parents would be happy to know that you ended up as road-kill? How can you focus on the road and the other cars around you when you are click-click-clicking your life away.

Now on to the adults, if we can seriously call them that. Here are some stats for you:

• Talking on a cell phone causes nearly 25% of car accidents.
• One-fifth of experienced adult drivers in the United States send text messages while driving.
• Studies have found that texting while driving causes a 400 percent increase in time spent with eyes off the road.
  

Don't you need your eyes on the road to drive? Thought so. So put your damned phones away, put your hands on the wheel, eyes on the road, and shut your pieholes and focus. You might just save someone's life, or your own.

And if this is not enough for you, please consider reading this post..but be warned, the images are frightening and hopefully enough to ensure you will never text while driving again.
"NO MORE TEXTING WHILE DRIVING"

Labels: cellphone etiqutte, cellphone texting, dangerous driving, dangers of texting and driving, driving and texting

While we are on the topic of television programming, which seems to be a major annoyance of ours these days, lets just have a quick look at Jon & Kate Plus 8. Never heard of them, never seen the show, personally I would not waste my time and would have more fun in a Turkish prison. Nonetheless, millions of Americans seems to turn into this rubbish week after week to see the latest antics of the Gosselin family. For the love of God.. WHY? Don't you all have enough drama and BS in your own lives? Or is it better to see others go through it because then you don't have to focus on your own stuff?

First and foremost, TLC presents this show. I used to watch TLC. It used to be one of my favorite channels because it used to present good quality shows and documentaries that were informative. TLC - THE LEARNING CHANNEL. What the hell. Where did the good programming go only to be replaced by another stupid reality show about a couple who had 8 children.

Why is octo-mom considered a nut but not these assholes? What is this Brady Bunch + 2? No one bothered to consider that putting them on a reality show with their kids would ultimately create problems in their marriage? What did they have in place in case it did? What did they do to prepare themselves and their children for a life on reality TV? Well lets see... Kate had a tummy tuck paid for by the show, and probably other cosmetic procedures. But what about the children...you know.. kiddies...in their formative years. Where is child welfare when you need them?

Well now they are getting divorced. Jon has allegedly bought an apartment in Manhattan. How? Does he have a job. Supporting 8 children without a reality show can be quite a challenge, so do they pimp themselves out to afford the lifestyle they have become accustomed to? Apparently there is a huge online debate about whether or not the show should continue. And based on what I have seen flipping through a few tabloids waiting in the grocey checkout lane, you can bet Momma wants this show to continue. She loves the fame, the fortune, the glory and the attention. She makes herself out to be a great celebrity. WTF-ever.

Let's face it, how many people watching are watching to see 8 little munchkins run around or to watch a marriage meltdown? Why the hell does someone want to watch this? This show didn't have a large audience, its not like it was in the top 10 ratings, but the media has made sure we all know the names of these two. Why?

Don't give me the bullshit that that many people care or watch this shit. The media just saturates us with all this info about these two when truthfully, most of us don't care, so please don't pretend that we do, and don't make it as if we do. What is with this "Team Jon" and "Team Kate"? What is with the "team" itself? Their marriage is their partnership,

THEY are supposed to be a team, we are supposed to concentrate on our own relationships. This "team" shit has to stop. Why are we encouraged to pick sides? How would we like it if all our relationships were judged this way? How would you like a "team" of people against YOU that don't even KNOW you? And what good does a team of people for you that can't do shit for you either? They need to get back to what is important in lives, which should be their children, and we need to focus on our own lives, because they are not perfect either.

A final thought is, are they really in trouble? Or is the only trouble with the ratings and this some stupid staged attempt to get more viewers through the creation of the media feeding frenzy? Who knows.. but I do know this, I won't be watching this show on TLC. But I am anxiously awaiting the release of the Gosselin Action Figure set.

Labels: Gosselins, Jon and Kate, Jon and Kate plus 8, The Learning Channel, TLC, Why do people watch Jon and Kate

You know the drill. You dial a number (bank, credit card company, doctors office) and the first thing you hear is the voice of the robot announcing "to listen to your options press 1". Companies and organizations, both large and small, want to route less and less calls to their customer service departments. They deliberately set up the phone systems to keep each caller, the customer, in a 15 minute loop of number pressing until you are able to speak to a human being.

They usually ask you to key in your account number, so have it ready, and even though you followed the directions and keyed it in, when/if you actually speak to a customer service rep the customer service rep will ask for it again? So why bother asking you for it before you reach a customer service rep? Why waste everyone's time?

Because they don't want you to wait. They want you to hang up and go away. They figure if you are away from home making this call you wont have your account number and hang up. Many times you cannot proceed with your call without the account number. They want to waste your time so it looks like it didn't take them a long time to get to you. It was YOUR fault.

No one likes these automated systems. Half, actually more than half, of the times you call, the issue you are calling about doesn't have a prompt so you don't know which button to push anyway! Then if you go to the wrong department and they have to transfer you, you will most likely get "magically" disconnected and you can start this whole annoying, time-wasting, getting-ready-to-load-your-gun-and-go-postal process all OVER AGAIN.

THIS IS CUSTOMER SERVICE? What customer appreciates this? Doesn't everyone, the second they call and discover this automated "barrier" between themselves and a human being, want to take the phone and throw it in a lake? Exactly. That is their point. They want you to hang up.

Don't get me started on the "press or say ___" bullshit either, because you either must repeat yourself 14 ZILLION times before the automated system understands you, or you have to scream so loud that you would drown out Ty Pennington and his megaphone. Hell, you would have to scream louder than an AC/DC concert. I cannot believe how LOUD I have had to scream to get them to understand me, and I am in a house with little or no background noise. Many people have to call from work, or when they are out running errands, places where screaming your account number is not a really great idea. With identity theft being a rising crime, it is also a stupid option. Pretty soon every f'n company will have one of these customer service/tech support automated systems, and we will all be at their mercy.

Do these systems make YOU feel like you are getting customer support or customer pissed off? Tech support or tech infuriated? The words "service" and "support" should in no way be used to describe these bullshit systems. Can they get any worse?

Labels: automated systems, customer service, customer service phone calls, poor customer service, telephone loops

Labels: parking, parking lots at the mall, parking the car, waiting for best parking spot

I'm a New Yorker, so I know real New York dialogue. Quick snark-ridden wit, with the camaraderie and constant putting each other down that groups of men find so necessary. There is always a pecking order, and the characters always know there place within it on this show.

The storyline is as fast paced as a New York minute, and they are not afraid to show the good and the bad of everyone. And I mean everyone. No character is a carricature, and you can't help but find yourself wanting to hang out with these people. And believe me, that says a lot, considering how dysfunctional they all are.

The show, thanks to the writers (Peter Tolan, Denis Leary, John Scurti, Robert Krausz, Salvatore Stabile, Micheal Caleo and Stephen Belber) does not stick to the cookie cutter formulas that let even the stupidest of people watching know where the storyline is going and what is going to happen next.

The show is centered around a firehouse and the firemen that work there. Tommy Gavin (played by Denis Leary) is the main character who deals with his everyday life while at the same time battling his demons from 9/11. I would tell you more about the show but I don't want to ruin it for anyone that hasn't seen it. I caught my first episode while season 4 was on, and I immediately bought the first 3 seasons to catch up. I would recommend everyone do the same.

There really is not too much that is intelligent or imaginative or new on TV these days, so give this great show a shot, it is on F/X on Tuesdays at 9 pm.

Labels: Denis Leary, Rescue Me, Rescue me best show, Tommy Gavin

I was driving through my neighborhood today and saw what appeared to be a young man walking on the sidewalk. As I got closer I realized that his pants, were not sitting at his waist, like a normal person, but sitting below his butt. Not on his butt. Not just below the waist. All the way under his butt. I could see his boxer shorts, thank God he was wearing some, and he was holding his pants up, by grabbing the belt in front as he walked, while he jabbered away on his cell phone. My question is WHY? Congratulations... I bet your momma is proud.

What fashionita created this fashion faux pais? I am not quite sure what it represents, nor how truly functional it is. I mean, if you are walking along holding your pants up with one hand, and the cell phone with the other, what are you going to do if you have an itch? Allow your pants to drop to the ground so you can scratch it? Then you would trip over your pants as they slipped to your ankles as you continue to walk. THIS WAY OF DRESSING IS STUPID AND YOU LOOK MORE STUPID WEARING IT. Pull your damned pants up for God's sake, we don't want to see your boxers, briefs, tidy whities, and we sure as hell don't want to see your hiney.

Secondly, while I was finding hiney photo above of Gangsta pants I came across something that stunned me even more. It is another fashion phenomenon of the Gangsta revolution - wearing out clothes backwards. I have no intelligent words for this, no way to even begin to express how totally stupid you look with your ass in the front. And the crotch in the back. Surely this can't be comfortable.

Your mother lets you out of the house like this? Does she put her clothes on backwards too? Does she wear her bra backwards? If so I bet she looks really weird with 4 boobs. Then again, if she does let you out of the house dressed this way, she clearly needs her head examining also.

Is there a point to this way of dressing? Are you saving wear and tear on the seat of your britches because you are getting double wear out them? Are you doing it with your underwear too? How do you pee without that slit in the front? Seriously.

Now I am fairly open minded and think people should be allowed to express their personality through their wardrobe. Well guess what? This is not self expression but self mutilation. You no longer look like a normal human being, but someone that belongs in a mental institution. Hell even at the mental institution if you dress like that they will be singing "The Lunatics Have Taken Over the Asylum".

So, what's next folks...wearing your clothes inside out?

Labels: baggy jeans, dressing like a gangsta, dressing like a rap star, gang, gangsta, jeans below butt, rap, streetwear, wearing clothes backwards, wearing pants below butt

If I go to a musicians website I expect music to be there.They are musicians, that is what they do. What I don't expect is music playing on websites where it doesn't serve a real purpose.

When I do searches in google and pop on a page and immediately hear music, I browser-back and get the hell out of there asap. I don't want to hear your sales pitch either. When you are trying to READ it is VERY distracting to hear music or a sales pitch. If you want people to come back to your site again and again, hasn't it dawned on you that EVERY time they come that have to hear the music AGAIN AND AGAIN or your sales pitch AGAIN AND AGAIN? Some jamokes don't even allow you to SHUT IT OFF!!

Don't put music on your website, put it on your IPOD.

What if it is late and we dont want the whole HOUSE to hear? Why not allow us to chose to listen to it as opposed to forcing us and THEN having to try and figure out if we can shut it off? That way, I might consider going to your site again, until then, Gooooo.

Labels: annoying websites, music, music playing on websites

It's that time again, when thousands upon thousands of talented hopefuls, and I use that term loosely, line up outside of theaters across the USA to compete in the America's Got Talent contest. After watching a few of the episodes I will have to agree that yes, America does indeed have some talent, but for the most part, the singing and shenanigans of many performers are reminiscent of The Gong Show.

While the judges are giving constructive, and in some cases much warranted destructive criticism of the acts, I find myself judging the judges. Piers has class, Sharon Osbourne is just cool for surviving life with Ozzy for so many years and then we have "the Hoff". Can someone please tell me why this man is still allowed to be on national television? Why? He has no talent, he has no ability to form complete sentences and he oogles all the attractive women on the show. What is the point? What is his point? As I watched him trying to speak, without thinking of course because they are mutually exclusive in his world, I was once more fully aware that he has no point whatsoever.

The judges have buzzers that flash big red Xs when they want to terminate a performer, all warranted I must say, and I find myself wanting to big red X Hasselhoff. Since he does not possess any talent as an actor, or singer for that matter, I am not sure what qualifications he holds for judging others' performance quality. And for those of you that did not know Hasselhoff made a very meager and embarrassing attempt at a singing career. He was loved and adored in Europe and even sang at the falling of the Berlin Wall, but in America, we clearly thought he did not have talent, so we big red Xed him. We shall entertain you with that here. And NO, this is not a joke.


"Ooga Chucka Ooga Chucka" - what exactly IS that? It sounds like a Neanderthal mating call. Come to think of it, he totally has that whole caveman image as he posseses their distinctive cranial features of including the ridged sloping forehead and furrowed brow.

So while we may not be cool for hasselling the Hoff, I wonder if the folks at Geico are looking for new cavemen for their ridiculously annoying commercials. So Dave, why don't you do us all a favor and get in your little "Kit car" and Knight Ride on over to the folks at Geico. Leave the talent to the talented because you will always get the from me.

Labels: Americas Got Talent, David Hasselhoff, Hooked on a Feeling, judges, judges on Americas Got Talent, television, tv, why is David Hassehoff still on tv

I am a smoker. smoke outside in my backyard. never in public, and not around other people. That is my choice, not because of any laws that have been passed. What pisses me off is the taxation of cigarettes and the hard time given to us smokers. Yes I know it is bad for me. Yes I know it is bad for you, so I dont smoke around you.

But what about you drinkers? Why can't you have a Joe Camel ad because they say it would influence children but budweiser was allowed to have the talking frogs and the lizards? How many people have died when hit in their vehicles by a smoker vs. a drunk driver? How many people are in therapy (or need to be) because of the terrible childhood they had because one of their parents (or both) SMOKED? How about DRANK?

How many women have had a date rape drug put in their cigarette vs their DRINK? How many people have gotten into fistfights at sporting events (or anywhere in public) because they SMOKED too much as opposed to DRANK too much? How many people acted violently because they were under the influence of nicotine vs. alcohol? How many men or women have had sex with someone that they otherwise wouldn't have had their judgement not been impaired by alcohol vs. cigarettes?

How many unwanted pregnancies can you attribute to the affects of alcohol vs. cigarettes? How many people lost their job, their family, and their friends because they are addicted to nicotine vs being an alcoholic? On cigarette packs the label warns of harm to a fetus if a pregnant woman smokes, where are the fetal alcohol syndrome warnings on a six pack?

How many people regret something or are embarrassed by something they did or said while smoking vs being drunk? I am not saying smoking is GOOD, I am just saying drinking is JUST AS BAD. It's time we stopped pointing the finger at tobacco and took a realistic view of alcohol as well.

Labels: dangers of alcohol, drunk driving, right to smoke, smoker, smoking, taxation of cigarettes, taxing alcohol, taxing cigarettes, unfair taxation of cigarettes

Television, a medium that employed actors, is now employing acter-outers.

It used to be, that in order to be on a TV show, you you had to be an actor, and not necessarily a good one, such asCharlie Sheen, who we really hate by the way. Now, thanks to reality TV, networks choose to broadcast reality shows using people who will act out the most. The "acter-outers", if you will. There is always a main acter-outer who behaves badly, who most viewers love to hate. The powers that be would say they make for great TV.

We say they make for embarrassing TV. If I want to watch a bunch of spoiled monsters I will go to a pre-school where I could most likely find one, I don't need to watch the idiots on "the hills". Meryl Streep doesn't have to lose any sleep worrying about competition from the "flavor of love girls" ok? Yet they are on our TV.

We are watching this, and making stars out of assholes. We are making them RICH assholes. You see a single mother struggling, working three jobs to put food on the table and put her kids through school and because we watch people act like douche bags in stupid reality crap, we make these douche bags RICH.

The joke is on us folks, and they are laughing all the way to the bank. We need justice, and for acter-outers to get their just rewards. TURN OFF THE TV. CHANGE THE CHANNEL.STOP WATCHING THIS STUPID CRAP AND GO READ A BOOK. Maybe the networks will listen if their ratings go down.

Labels: Charlie Sheen, hate Charlie Sheen, reality shows, reality shows are stupid, stupid reality shows, television, tv, why reality shows

Labels: African American, job description, job titles, what is in a title, why are we called what we are called

Ever notice the celebrities you cant stand stick around like a bad smell but the celebrities you want to see more of disappear?

Here is our list of who needs to get off our cloud, and the ones that need to make a comeback:

GET OFF OUR CLOUD - WE DONT CARE WHERE YOU GO, JUST GO AWAY!

1) Charlie Sheen : apparently there are no other actors on earth, that is why they have to keep a wife beating, hooker hiring charmer like this employed. He should have been banished from acting just for hooking up with Denise Richards in the first place.

2) Paris Hilton - enough with this anal swab already!

3) The Kardashians - Did we need brunette versions of Paris Hilton? And someone needs to tell us WHY we are "Keeping up with them..."?

4) Lindsay Lohan - name the last artistic contribution she has made, better yet, name ANY artistic contribution she has made.

5) Actually anyone Famous for no good reason see numbers 2 and 3.

6) The cavemen and stupid money with eyes from the Geico commercials - Someone is getting paid BIG BUCKS to torture us with this shit!!!

7) The plastic eerie Burger King - the stuff of nightmares

8) Bill O'Reilly - self-explanatory

9) Denise Richards the train wreck to end all train wrecks. Ryan Seacrest is putting HER back on TV and should be punished as well

10) The Jonas Brothers - they aren't even cute.

11) TOM CRUISE - Pick a reason. Any reason. There are so many. And we put your photo Tom, because hate you the most and you look really stupid in this photo.

12) Will Smith - Now he is going to force his kids on us. Lovely.

13) All the real *cough* housewives of anywhere - I mean really, is that what REAL housewives do all day? What they do on the show?
WE WANT TO SEE MORE OF:

1) Debra Winger

2) Rosanna Arquette

3) Bill Pullman

4) Renee Russo

5) Helen Hunt

6) Liam Neeson

7) Hugh Grant

8) Keanu Reeves

9) Goldie Hawn

Labels: Burger King, complaint, Denis Leary, Dennis Richards, Helen Hunt, Liam Neesan, Renne Russo, stars making a comeback, stars who need to go away, stars who need to shut up, Tom Cruise

After dinner tonight I had to run out to Target to get some Fancy Feast for the ferocious felines who were not happy with the Whiskas I served up for them. Before dinner I had downed two very large glasses of water to combat the Africa death hot 100 degree temperatures we are experiencing. So rather than give TMI, because that it was I got tonight, lets suffice to say that I had to use Target's facilities.

I don't like public restrooms. They are dirty. They smell. People do horrible things in there that God forbid they don't do at home. At least I hope so. As I entered I heard a woman mumbling away, but I did not see anyone, so I quickly selected a clean stall and proceeded to do pee. She continues chatting away, I thought maybe to her child in the stall with her because she is talking about a dress. Then I hear the toilet flush. Oh surely she has taken her child to the toilet as she continues what I then realized was a ONE WAY conversation.

OH HELL NO. She was talking on her cellphone, making all sorts of bodily function noises, and just chatting away to someone on the other end. My question is... What is so fucking important that it can't wait 10 minutes, so you can wipe you butt, wash your hands and then take the call after you leave the restroom? I don't think that person on the other end was dying, because you were talking about a dress, so why did it have to be then? I mean really, how uncomfortable for the person you were talking to as she must have known you were in the toilet. How disrespectful, to your friend and to your fellow toilet goers. And you can't tell me that you are not getting germs on your phone and then holding it up to your face... EEEEEEEEWWWWWWW. Time and again, I have heard phones go off in a public restroom and am stunned every time when people actually answer them. WHY? It can WAIT. Flush the toilet, wash your hands, then go and call them back outside. It is not life or death. Get over yourself.

When did we become so rude and discourteous? When we started using cellphones. It has become an epidemic. People are texting other friends and family while they are having dinner, coffee, drinks with others. People can't even leave the goddammed things in the car while they are at the movies. You can't be without your electronic leash for two hours? WTF? I can understand if you are a doctor on call, or waiting for the transplant team to tell you your kidney is on its way, but to be so inconsiderate of others that you can't leave your phone, or at least turn it off in a movie theater. How fucking rude. And before the movie starts, there is the little advert that tells you to turn them OFF - and everyone fumbles around - seem it a hundred times, the ritual of turning the cellphone to vibrate - but then, just wait, it happens every time.. so stupid fucking asshole's phone rings during the movie. Are you that important? Will they give your kidney to someone else. And it is not just about the phone ringing ok people..but also about texting in the movie. If I am sitting behind you and you open your phone to text someone I see the glare from your phone, as well as what you are writing. Get off your lazy ass, go out to the lobby and do it, or better yet, go sit on the toilet.

I went to a very close friends funeral a few years ago. Of course during a funeral service in a funeral home, one would expect everyone's cell phones and pagers to be turned off for the duration of the service. That seems like the respectful thing to do. Right? But NO. Some asshole, who happens to be my ex-husbands brother, did not turn his phone off, and right in the middle of the service, we were greeted with the echols of "The Good, The Bad and the Ugly". I could have killed him. Then we could all let our cell phones play at his funeral, all the while saying Gooo!

Labels: cellphone etiqutte, cellphones at funerals, cellphones in movies, cellphones in public restroom, cellphones in restroom, cellphones in toilet, manners, rudness, texting